This month’s #tsql2sday is brought to you by Mohammad Darab, a relatively new #SQLSaturday speaker (congrats!) and all-around-great-guy. Feeling introspective, he invites us to write a letter to our 20 year old self. Quite coincidental that I’ve been in a “letter writing mood” lately on my other blog. 😉
A couple things. First, DTB (rated PG-13 link). SRSLY. The high school girlfriend is NOT the one, nor does she treat you well at all. It’s gonna be over a year after you graduate, so do yourself a favor and break it off now so you can enjoy college more.
Second, study more, game less. It’s gotten ridiculous. You had straight A’s. You’ll get your first D EVER if you don’t take that network programming class seriously. And it will hurt. Your ego AND your GPA.
Finally! Hardware ain’t for you. Software is where it’s at. And data stuff. ALL the data! Someone’s gonna coin the phrase “data is the new oil”. Hey! That should be YOU! Do it.
Where the Rubber Meets the Road
Your first job is going to be amazing. You’ll spend NINE years at that company. Probably a bit too long. They weren’t very understanding when your wife was very sick and needed your help running around to doctors and pharmacies and such. But you’ll work some truly awesome people, connections that will last many years. That’s called ‘networking’ — making sure you stay in touch with those people. It will help open up future career opportunities.
Yes, I said “wife”. We’ll get to that in a bit.
Spend your 20s doing silly things, adventurous things, but focus on your career. If I had to do it all over again, I would branch out sooner, explore more opportunities earlier, and look at the world of tech beyond this little suburb. There is so much more out there. Not that there’s anything wrong with suburbia — our town is great. I love it. But it’s not a tech-job haven. So don’t be afraid of that big change, that big opportunity.
Because once you go for it, once you finally take that chance, you’ll be oh-so-much happier! Ride that wave of confidence and of learning new things. Start attending SQL Saturdays earlier, and look into other data-centric meetups and events. There is so much to learn, and never enough time.
Oh, and PS: be super careful driving. Please.
Yes, you will find love. You will find the love of your life. The One. Your soulmate. When you least expect it. You will spend your latter 20s and early 30s having the best years of your life with her. She will be your everything. She is laughter, passion, heartache, support, grace, care, light, love, and life itself. Cherish every moment.
A question that’s often asked of grievers is, if they knew what would happen, would they go back, change anything, do anything different. In this thought experiment, even — would I tell my past self what would happen to my wife? No, I don’t think I would. For even now, as I look back on the million little moments that we shared and loved and laughed and cried. I would do it all again in a heartbeat. Our love was once-in-a-lifetime. I know that in my soul. And I carry that flame in my heart. May it never be extinguished.